Merry Christmas! This will be my last regular post in 2023. Thank you so much for your support.
It was the best Christmas ever. My friends and I had decided that the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy were make-believe. But Santa? He was the real deal. He lived on the North Pole, where he and his elves were busy making toys for us.
I was so excited Santa Claus was coming to town on Christmas Eve. On the evening news, they used a radar to track Santa. He was over southeast Asia. The Air Force even sent planes to escort him over the Pacific.
That night, I could barely sleep. After tossing and turning, I got up to look out my window. And lo and behold! Santa and his reindeer flew past my window. I was positive I'd seen them.
My inner five-year-old still dreams of a magical holiday season. As we all know, "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," but it doesn’t always feel that way.
This year will be different
Now that I’m older and tired, that song has often made me want to scream at my half-decorated Christmas cookies, unwrapped gifts, and endless to-do lists. In addition, Hallmark movies and angels have yet to teach me the true meaning of Christmas.
This year will be different—no more stress from my unrealistic expectations.
A few years ago, I went to a counselor to help me with anxiety from addiction in our family. She had me write out snapshots from my life and read them at our next session. One of her observations was that I was afraid I would ruin special occasions. It was true, and I'd never realized it.
But it doesn't have to stay that way. I can take a new approach to the season, change my mindset, and avoid negative thought patterns. Even my family would prefer me to be happy and relaxed rather than scurrying around trying to make the holiday special.
A peaceful heart can feel unattainable
Jesus said, "My yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 28:30b NIV) But I've thought, "Well, it doesn't feel that way." However, he was addressing all the burdensome expectations that the Pharisees had added to the law. Jesus wasn’t saying our lives would be comfortable, but he was freeing us from legalism. Relaxing and loving God should be easy, but a peaceful heart can feel unattainable when we have unrealistic expectations.
There are so many reasons to celebrate this year. Psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl said, "Between the stimulus and the response, there is space, and in that space is your power and freedom." We choose our attitude.
Paul wrote, "Rejoice in the Lord always." (Philippians 4:4a NIV), but joy will be impossible if I continually inflict unrelenting standards on myself. We're victorious as long as we're still trying and haven't given up.
The past year has been remarkable
Instead of tallying my unfinished projects, evaluating my year, and thinking about my New Year's Resolutions, I will acknowledge how God has worked.
Despite all the transitions, medical issues, and other hardships, the past year has been remarkable. I took on new responsibilities that I didn't think I could handle. Through learning to navigate Social Security, Medicaid, and the medical system, I found help for Charlotte. She's become a happy, communicative little two-year-old.
Todd and I also started new careers. (Todd is a realtor, so if you need to buy or sell property in Texas ...) And our marriage has been thriving even though 85% of marriages that include a child with special needs fail.
We marvel at God and how he has brought victories
Appreciating our successes isn't self-congratulatory. We marvel at God and how he has brought victories despite our lowest moments. When I despaired, and it seemed God wasn't answering my prayers, I wondered why the difficulties kept piling up. However, looking back, I'm amazed at how God has helped me start over in my 60s.
I can be proud of 2023 despite the low points. Focusing on victories will lead to confidence and trust in 2024.
The Bible's message revolves around love, redemption, and new beginnings. God desires people to experience his mercy and grace, not dwell excessively on their faults or mistakes. Subtle thoughts and attitudes of inadequacy can derail peace, joy, and faith.
Even from the beginning, he's reassured us. The creation account says, "he rested from all his work." (Genesis 2:2 NIV) God didn't need to rest; he was setting us an example. The writer of Genesis was engaging formerly enslaved people who believed their worth came from their work. They were afraid to rest. The command to keep the Sabbath wasn't another rule but a blessing.
God didn't stop caring for Adam and Eve even after they fell from grace. He provided them with better, warmer clothing.
Those examples are minor details, but they still move my heart. It's easy to forget the extraordinariness of "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only son." (John 3:16a ESV) God's most significant act of love was sending Jesus, which this season commemorates.
We can confidently march into 2024 because “we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." (Romans 8:37 NIV) This year, I won't make resolutions or think about what I want to change but how I will build on the successes.
We've already started celebrating; Charlotte and I have hung our homemade Play-Doh cookies on her special tree.
On Christmas Eve, we may even watch for Santa to fly by together.
I pray all of you have a wonderful Christmas!
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